The Office
by ColaVixen Inc
Summary: Kirkland Electronic Co. is a very sucessful company. It has all the machines you could possibly need from laptops that move and dancing phones. The problem? It's employees, who are a bunch of hooligans that can't get along. AU pairings inside


**Alright! New story! The plot bunnies are eating at me again...I don't own Hetalia. ******

**Pairings: USxUK( adorable)****  
****Spamano****  
****RoChu****  
****Giripan****  
****PruCan****  
****AusHun****  
****GerIta****  
****Others****  
**  
" ALFRED, GET YOUR HAMBURGER EATING ASS DOWN HERE NOW!" Arthur Kirkland, the boss of Kirkland Electronics Co., screamed at the top of his lungs while mentally cursing his Vice President. ' Why did I hire that stupid git anyways?'

There was a hurried shout and some cussing from his personal receptionist, Lovino Vargas, before an energetic, clueless blonde burst through the burgundy doors of the enraged Englisman's office.

" Yeah Artie?" Alfred F. Jones asked, a hamburger clutched in his hand.

" What the bloody hell are you up to now?" Arthur growled.

Alfred paused and blinked, taking a bite of his hamburger before replying, " Huh? Oh, I was on lunch break." He swallowed the huge bite, and how it fit down, Arthur would never know.

" Again?" Arthur's frown deepend, and Alfred barely restrained a giggle as it made his eyebrows look larger. "You were just on one an hour ago!"

" I-" He took another bite and swallowed. "-know, but I craved another hamburger!"

" Those things are going to kill you one day!" Arthur argued, pressing his fingers to his temples and rubbing in soothing circles.

Alfred, being the hamburger loving American he is, had to defend his beloved " meat" " But they're really good, Artie!"

" Bloody-You know what?" Arthur sighed. " I'm done with this conversation. Keep eating those heartattacks on a bun, see if I care."

Alfred nodded, mouth full of hamburger, and grinned. " You know you love me!"

" Anyways," Arthur calmed down a bit. " Let's discuss what you were called here for. Did you get those documents printed out? They're due by friday."

Alfred, who was spinning in the office chair, stopped. " Uh...Oh look at the time, I really need to-" He started to get up to make a hasty exit, when he was stopped by the furious president.

" Alfred. Where. Are. The. Documents?" Arthur stood up, face shielded by his bangs.

Alfred wondered if he'd ever see his dog Tony again, eat another hamburger, or ever get to tell his brother that he'd accidentaly shredded his favorite hockey stick. " I...don't have them?"

Then Arthur snapped. " WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T HAVE THEM? YOU IDIOT!"

The American briefly wondered wether he should run, scream, or do both. He settled for both. " PLEASE DON'T HURT ME! I'M TOO COOL TO DIE!" He ran out of the room, passed a pissed Italian who was fighting off a love sick Spaniard, passed the confused Kiku Honda, who was attempting to speak to a snoring Heracles about his duties, and passed his near invisible brother and that polar bear he was carrying around, trying to get away from the yelling Brit behind him.

" Al?" Said Canadian blinked, ignoring the polar bear that was licking some ice cream off of a forgotten spoon( probably left by that Cuban errand boy). ' Huh, I was going to tell him that I printed those documents out, but oh well.' He shrugged and headed back out of the office.

" Heracles-san?" Kiku gently shook the snoring Greek. " I have those files you asked for."

The lazy man opened one eye, reaching up to stroke a cat that was meowing on the top of his head. "...Oh...thank you..." He accpeted the manilla folders, and set them on his messy desk( full of cat pictures and photos).

" Did you need anything-Heracles-san?" Kiku stared with slight concern at the brunette, who's head fell onto the desk with a lazy snore. ' I see.' Kiku bowed swiftly before turning around.

Before he could open the door, it was slammed open to allow a maskless Turk entrance. " Stupid Greek! Where's my mask?" He bellowed.

Heracles frowned and opened an emerald orb. " Why would I have your stupid mask? It's ugly and plain, just like you." He closed his eye.

" YOU BRAT! I'M NOT PLAIN AND UGLY!" DON'T YOU DARE SLEEP WHILE I'M YELLING AT YOU!" Sadiq stomped over to the cat lover.

" Meow?" A brown, furry head with ears popped out from the stack, only to be knocked out by an enraged Turk's hand as he made to grab for Heracles's collar.

Heracles was awake now, and bent over to pick up the cat, all while cursing the yelling man in Greek.

" IF YOU BASTARDS DON'T SHUT UP, I'LL-" Lovino yelled from his desk.

" You'll what, Lovi?" A spanish accented voice interrupted the yelling.

There was a thump, followed by an yelp, signalling that Lovino had either been tackled into a hug, or he had headbutted Antonio. A wail and some curses indicated that it was the latter.

" So mean!" Antonio pulled himself up, groaning a bit.

Lovino glared at the Spaniard as he reseated himself. " Serves you right, bastard." He rolled his eyes when Antonio straightned and grinned.

" Ok, Lovi! You look like an adorable tomato!" Antonio rushed in for another hug, only to be elbowed sharply in his still sensitive gut. " Oof!" He fell over, fake tears streaming from his eyes.

" Don't touch me, bastard!" Lovino yelled, taking a bite of a tomato that sat on his desk.

" But-" Antonio was interrupted by a thud, and Arthur walked by, dragging a wailing Alfred behind him. " Umm...boss? Is everything ok?"

Arthur stopped at the door, one hand on the handle, and turned to stare murderously at the receptionist and manager. " ...Do I even need to answer that?"

Both Italian and Spaniard alike gulped before shaking their heads quickly, backing up some. " N-no." Antonio waved a hand.

Alfred began to whine, only to be silenced by a low growl. He flashed Lovino a look that said " help me!" as Arthur fumbled with the keys.

With wide eyes, Lovino shook his head quickly and glared back, " No way in hell!" He mouthed, and watched with slight sympathy as Alfred was dragged into the devil's lair.

"...You still look like a-"

" Not. A. Single. Word." Lovino gave Antonio a harsh glare, sending the tanned man into silence.

" Lovino?"

" What? I thought I told you-"

" The coffee maker is on fire." Antonio pointed to the machine, which had flames erupting from the top.

" ...Shit!"

-

**I know, short chapter is short, but it's only the first one. I promise that the other ones are gonna be longer! And yes, Matthew gets his polar bear. Why? Because I can. Any questions? Please tell me about any mistakes, I hate them as much as you do. Don't be afraid to criticize, just not too harsh, ok? I kinda need your opinions on what to do and fix, so you'll enjoy this story. :) ******

**Review! ...or not. Any suggestions or things you want to see, just tell me**


End file.
